Is It Time for Some New Tools?

This sucks. I’m over it. I wanna eat an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s Half Baked ice cream and chase it down with potato chips and onion dip. I’m sick and tired of being conscious of every food or drink decision I make. I just wanna be like everyone else and eat whatever I want. Wahhh.

Yeah, little Kerri has been throwing some tantrums lately, and I know it’s because I’m breaking through another level of resistance and fear as I travel along my diet and exercise journey. Clearly, there’s some discomfort coming up and I’m having to fight the urge to reach for my age-old coping mechanism: food.

In the past, when I would “treat” her to unhealthy snacks, I thought I was doing right by her, but in fact, I was telling her to shut up; that I didn’t want to hear about her feelings, which pissed her off more and made me want to eat more crap.

I know now that when she’s craving a certain food like ice cream or chips, what she’s really calling out for is my love, attention, and compassion. The trick is finding new tools to meet her needs.

A few days ago, as I was out exercising, I was sharing my current hurdle with my sister. Together, we did some tapping (a la the Emotional Freedom Technique) as we walked, and within minutes I felt some energy shift. It was subtle, but it was movin’! And since then, I’ve been experiencing some notable improvement in my tantrums. So that one’s going in the toolbox.

I’ve also been participating (well, I was procrastinating, but am now participating) in the online Brené Brown course on The Gifts of Imperfection. As I was doing the art journal assignment last night, I was completely connected and in my body. I felt happy, childlike, centered, and grounded – and totally connected to little Kerri. Instead of beating myself up for not keeping up with the assignments, I re-read the permission slip Brené had us create in Lesson 1 and noticed I had written “permission to go at my own pace.” Ha! Perfect. This class is another tool in the box.

Is it time for you to find some new tools? Consider these options, in addition to the ones mentioned above:

• Meditation. Don’t let the word scare you. Meditation is practiced in a variety of ways. Whether it’s a walking meditation, a guided program, or simply sitting in silence, find a way that works for you. I particularly like Deepak Chopra’s complimentary 21-Day Meditation Challenges. There’s one going on right now, in fact. To learn more, click here.
• Inner child dialogue. OK, this may sound way too woo woo for you, but stay with me here. Consider taking out your journal or a notebook and writing a question at the top of the page to start a conversation with your inner child. For example, I may write something like, “What feels so uncomfortable right now?” Then I let little Kerri have at it. I allow her to write freely without censoring, evaluating, or trying to fix her. I usually find that, by about page 3, she’s sharing some pretty kick-ass wisdom. BONUS: Use a fun-colored pen for her voice (I use purple).
• Yoga. Another great way to get really connected to self is through a gentle, flowing yoga routine. If you’ve never done yoga, don’t let the idea intimidate you. You can rent a program on TV, buy a DVD, or follow a flow online. You don’t have to jump into a public class if that feels too scary to you. For a DVD, I recommend Rodney Yee’s Yoga for Beginners.

As Henry Ford said, “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.”

Yes, charting a new course takes commitment and work, dammit. I wish I could offer a magic shortcut to get you to the brass ring, but if you want long-term, sustaining, positive change, you need to build a strong foundation. In the meantime, remember this promising tidbit: You’ll feel the joy of success just by starting. (click to tweet!)

Now I want to hear from YOU. Are you feeling stuck somewhere and can’t seem to come up with a new approach? Have you found some new tools that are rockin’ your world? Let’s keep the convo going in the comments below!

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