Make the Connection
I’m walking down my street to head into the woods for a hike when I notice two people sitting in lawn chairs just inside the park. As I get closer, I see that it’s an elderly couple, probably in their late 70s/early 80s, each reading a book. I see the woman reach over and rub the man’s arm. He looks at her and smiles.
This silent action sends a loud and clear message of love and contentment. I smile and wave as I walk by. This hike has already made my top 10 walks and I’m only 5 minutes in!
It’s refreshing, in this busy, digital age, to see a couple be with each other so simply and intentionally, and it reminds me of the importance of connection. With social media, emails, and texting, we can feel like we’re in regular contact with the people in our lives, but nothing replaces time spent physically together.
A couple of months ago, we, along with two good friends, started a weekly tradition of getting together for a Sunday barbecue and bevvies after our softball game. We alternate houses and food and drink contributions, making it nice and easy for this to happen, and it’s become something I look forward to every week, and a highlight of the summer.
Sure, we text and chat on Facebook, but spending this time together has deepened our friendships and enriched my life in a way a digital connection could never have. It’s a simple, silly time together, with some deeper conversations sprinkled in on occasion. We laugh, we belt out tunes from our youth, nosh on some good grub, and indulge in yummy summer beer and cocktails.
I leave feeling full – not just physically, but spiritually, too. These Sunday get-togethers are good for my soul, my health, my business, and my relationships. Who knew taking care of my body, mind, and spirit, and marketing my business could be so fun?
Cause that’s what’s going on when we connect authentically with the people we love and care about, and with the aspects of our lives that matter the most – we’re refueling and de-stressing. We’re coming back to our center and are more present for the daily demands, which begin feeling not so, well, “demanding.”
Consider these ideas to help you connect more intentionally:
- Send a greeting card to someone – a real, snail mail card, not an e-card. Whether it’s a birthday, an anniversary, or a “just thinking about you” card, the recipient will be thrilled with the surprise; but not as thrilled as you’ll be having sent it.
- Instead of eating lunch at your desk, go outside to connect with nature. Sit on a bench or bring a blanket. Stretch out and enjoy the beauty as you digest.
- Schedule a weekly coffee date/get together with someone in your life whose friendship you’d like to deepen, and whom you’re excited to spend time with (this part is really important!). Doing so will help you be a more patient and loving parent, spouse, employee, biz owner, etc.
- Invite your kids to help with dinner instead of having them watch TV. Remember, kids spell love: T-I-M-E.
- Replace one text this week with a phone call. Even if you have to leave a voice mail, speaking your message instead of writing it will feel more connected.
- Take your dog for an extra-long walk and be intentional in your time together. Instead of talking on the phone as you go through the motions, put it away and throw a stick, run around, or wrestle in the grass.
When we really show up and are present in our lives, magic happens. Actually, the magic is always happening; it’s just whether we’re awake enough to see it. How will you wake up and be more present? Think you’ll try any of the above suggestions? Let’s keep chatting in the comments below!
I guess we, Ma and I, are like that couple on your walk. It is great to talk to people directly and fill a void. We ran into some friends at Wal*Mart a couple of weeks ago, and in the conversation we found out George was having problems with his legs to the point he was going to have a big toe amputated. Ma suggested he see my leg surgeon. They did and were thrilled! After lots of tests and new recommendations, they will maybe save his toe!
What a thrill to have helped someone.
love DAD
Wow, Daddy-O! That’s so great! What a gift that they ran into you at the store. Oh, yes, the power of human connection strikes again! Thanks for sharing your story with me and my readers. Love you!
As a twitter extrovert but real life introvert I do have to push myself to do “in person” networking. It’s easier just to send an email, text message, or tweet sometimes rather than to connect in person.
This morning I pushed myself to go to a business networking group breakfast. It would have been much easier to sleep in than drive 30 minutes across town to attend the meeting. This group has an inspirational speaker each week. One exercise today was to stare into the eyes of the person sitting next to you for three minutes without saying anything. Yikes! “Get me back to my home office!” I immediately thought. Yet I got through it and made a deeper connection with my table mate through this exercise and in a followup conversation.
Thanks for the reminder, Kerri, of the importance of real “in person” connections. Social networking is great (that’s how I first found you!) but not to the exclusion of face to face meetings to go along with it. – Tim
Yeah, Tim! Way to push yourself and get to that meeting. Sounds like the whole experience was a Stretch Zone Adventure for you. Pay attention to what great things come your way now that this energy has been stirred up and is flowing. Fantastic!!
What a great reminder to keep nudging myself out there. THANKS, Kerri — great piece of well-written advice!