Resistance — You Again?

Recently, I had plans to get together with friends. However, something came up at the last minute and we had to cancel. I was disappointed, but the cause was out of my hands. I found myself stewing, as I was looking forward to seeing them, and disappointing friends is not high on my priority list.

There I was, aggravated. After a bit, I thought, “Is my being annoyed going to change the fact that we had to cancel?” Nope, it sure isn’t.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we only had to learn each life lesson once? Like our good old friend, “resistance”. That little gem always causes such suffering, and seems to rear its head often.

I could have spent my entire evening disappointed, resisting the fact that we had to cancel, or I could accept what is and re-frame the scope of my night.

So, after some short-term pouting, I chose to accept the reality, and then I was able to enjoy a nice, relaxing evening at home.

You’ve probably heard the saying “What we resist, persists.” But, have you really thought about what that means? Think of it this way: Our suffering is most often caused by our resistance to what is. Go back and re-read that statement. Let it really sink in. Disliking the way things are right now, and spending your energy on disliking it, is never the answer in making it better.

Think about an area of your life that you wish was different, better, or easier. Now, honestly evaluate how much of the aggravation you feel is due to how much you don’t want that particular area to look or feel the way it currently does. When we resist so strongly something that is the truth for us right now, we keep an energetic tie to the undesired situation that can be difficult to break. The key to breaking it? Yup, you guessed it — Let It Be. Try releasing the choke-hold on how frustrating things currently seem, and not only will you feel some quick relief to your stress. but you’ll also be able to more easily come up with steps you can take to improve it. The last thing you want to do is resist your resistance. 😉

I love the photo above. The shirt and sweatshirt together read, “Resist”, but zipper up the sweatshirt, and you get the word, “Rest.” When you don’t resist, you get to rest — and you get to be far more open to new opportunities and possibilities.

When you find yourself annoyed, aggravated, or hurt, stop and ask, “Is there anything I can do to change the reality of my current situation?” If not, recognize your suffering for what it is and give yourself permission to let go. If you are able to identify logical action steps to help you out of your dilemma, start by deciding which small, manageable move to make first.

So, what are you resisting?

Photo by L. Marie