What’s Your “Yeah, but…”?
Is there something you dream of doing that you’ve convinced yourself isn’t possible? What if you’re wrong?
Two of my clients were recently featured in a New York Times column about going after their dream of a living location independent lifestyle despite owning a business that needs running and responsibilities that need tending.
I remember when Brett and I started working together. He talked about loving the idea of the “NyLon” life (jetting back and forth between New York and London). He was getting quite bored being stationary in the UK and wanted to be able to take off, and not just to New York. Fortunately, his wife, Debbie, who was already a client of mine, was on board with the idea.
You’ll see, from the article linked above, that they have been jet-setting around the globe for almost a year now, and their business, believe it or not, has flourished as a result (not in spite of).
You might be saying, “Sure, that’s nice for them, but I have children/a traditional job/aging parents/too much debt/etc.” That, my friend, is your “yeah, but.”
“Oh yeah, I’d love to _________, but I’ve got __________.”
While Brett and Debbie’s dream was to live in different locations throughout the year, your dream may look entirely different. Maybe you’d just like to have a date night once a week with your spouse. Maybe you’d like to take off to the beach in the afternoon to read.
Whatever your dream is, it is absolutely possible despite any objection you can come up with. All it takes is a shift in perspective, brainstorming of options, and action.
Perspective: Instead of coming up with all the reasons why you can’t do something, ask yourself, “What if it is possible?” Play make believe.
Options: Given your current life circumstances, come up with at least five things you could do or change to fulfill your dream, even if it seems hard. What would have to be shifted, revised, or eliminated? You might find this easier by imagining a friend came to you asking for ideas on achieving the same goal. What would you tell him or her?
Action: OK, you’ve allowed yourself to consider the possibility, you’ve come up with some plausible things you could do to move toward your goal, now it’s time to test the waters. As you’ll see in the article about the Davidsons that I linked to above, they simply looked into what it would take to rent out their flat. No decisions were made nor plane tickets bought. They simply dipped their toes.
Taking action lets the universe (and yourself) know that you mean business; that you’re no longer just daydreaming. Whether you fulfill your dream or not, either way, you’re better off for it. Maybe taking the steps created a whole new dream for you!
It can be scary to go after a goal, and as protection from the fear, you might default to your “yeah, but” as a reason to not step out of your comfort zone. But the thing is, as soon as you step out, you’ll realize that the zone was never very comfortable to begin with.
I’ve got a couple open slots in my practice. If you’d like help with strategies, action, and accountability, check out my VIP coaching program on my services page. Then, schedule a complimentary exploratory phone call to chat. (Please be sure to read the package information prior to scheduling the call to be sure the format and fee are a fit).
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